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Blog

Moms Unite: How to Create a Babysitting Co-op

7/11/2016

 
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As a new mom, the most important thing you can do is to find a group of like-minded moms whom you trust. You will trust these moms with your new mom questions, your deepest, darkest mom confessions, and eventually, the care of your child.

I moved to Hoboken, New Jersey when I was eight months pregnant, about to embark on life as a stay-at-home mom, knowing no one. I describe this place, a tiny one-mile city, minutes outside of Manhattan, as magical, although I didn’t know it yet. Urban and completely kid-friendly, the streets runneth over with strollers and babywearing mamas. At the time, I had no idea how much support a new mom needed, but it was here in Hoboken, that I found my circle of moms, the women who got me through daily life as a first-time mom.

When we finally came up for a breath from mommyhood and realized how much more we could accomplish without children in tow, it was only natural that we decided to create our babysitting co-op together. At first, it allowed us to get that overdue haircut or make a doctor’s appointment, but soon we progressed to date nights with our husbands. This co-op proved so successful that I did not hire my first official babysitter until my son was close to two-years-old. And, with a sitter costing 12 to 15 dollars for one child, that added up to quite the savings.

WHAT YOU NEED TO CREATE A BABYSITTING CO-OP:

  1. You need a group of moms that have similar parenting styles: Would you let your child cry-it-out? Do you limit your child’s TV viewing or diet in any way? Obviously, flaky friends need not apply. Reliability is key.
  2. A group large enough to accommodate your requests. We had nine moms in ours, although I usually relied on the same two or three.
  3. A method of “payment.” What you don’t want is one person becoming the default sitter. In our case, we paid in “gold” coins (available here on Amazon). Moms took their stash seriously, volunteering when their supply of coins ran low.
  4. A clearly defined set of rules 

OUR RULES:*These were the actual rules used by our co-op 
  1. Every participant starts with 30 coins
  2. One 1/2 hour of babysitting=1 token
  3. One hour of babysitting= 2 tokens
  4. Night-time babysitting= regular token rate plus a “penalty” of 3 tokens. For example, if you went out for 3 hours, that would cost 6 tokens + 3 token penalty= 9 tokens.
  5. Daytime: presume babysitting includes drop-off at “sitter’s” home unless otherwise requested
  6. Nighttime: presume babysitting takes place at child’s home unless otherwise requested
  7. Provide “sitter” with emergency numbers, including doctor information as well as a schedule of the nightly routine
  8. No baths will be given
  9. Requests for babysitting should be sent to the group as a whole (mainly to ensure that everyone is actively participating in the co-op)
  10. (We lived in a city where we walked everywhere so this may not apply to you). If you return late at night, provide cab fare
Note: second child rate will be revisited at a later time.

Daytime sessions were essentially playdates. My son was not an easy baby. More than once, I would return to find my friend wearing him in the Ergo for hours on end. Still, I never worried, leaving him with such close friends.

At night, before we went out, we tried to feed our children and put them to bed before our friend arrived to babysit. I really looked forward to the nighttime sessions, to the peace of someone else’s home. Rather than spending my nights folding laundry, loading dishes, and thinking of all the other tasks I should be doing, I would watch TV, read a book, and organize my photos.

I should mention that once most of us got pregnant with our second child, this co-op, unfortunately, fell apart. As more and more of our co-op members fled to the suburbs, our original pool dwindled. As I sit here now, years later, I wonder if that wasn’t the case if this co-op could have continued.

In fact, revisiting this subject, I think a co-op could still work for me. Now that my kids are older and I live in the suburbs, I may just start one up again!

Have you tried a co-op? Did it work for you?

Michelle Platt is a local blogger and mom of two. She writes about trying to maintain her sanity and her savings in suburbia using technology, apps, and life hacks. It’s a little bit MacGyver meets Oprah’s favorite things, mixed with the brutal honesty of motherhood. 

Read more from her at her blog, My Purse Strings

Top Ten Things on my Mommy Wish List

7/6/2016

 
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  1. I want to cry over the spilled milk on my floor, on my couch, in my car, on my new dress..
  2. I want a “time out” of one minute for each year of my age. 40 minutes sounds pretty good…
  3. I want “bling” that is not made from macaroni or cheerios.
  4. I want artwork that is not made with washable markers.
  5. I want wine and not whining.
  6. I want a day where I do not hear the words: “but, how come, why not, I don’t know, he did it, one more, and because…”
  7. I want to wake my kids at 2am to get me water because I am thirsty then wake them again at 3am because I AM STILL THIRSTY.
  8. I want to throw up on someone and have them clean it up…
  9. I want someone to tell ME to take a nap!
  10. and last but not least I want ONE MORE MINUTE PLEASE!

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler! 

​Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

Listen To Your Mother...

6/29/2016

 
Happy girl
Photo Credit: Jane Goodrich Photography
Be kind even when the rest of the world isn't.

Be respectful. Respect your elders, women, your peers and other people's beliefs.

Know when to fight back and when to walk away. Never throw the first punch but if need be punch back.

Worry your mother and travel the world. Climb, trek, fly, explore, taste and experience new things.

Follow your heart and have your heart broken because sometimes the only way to know you met “the one” is to first meet the one who “wasn’t”. 

Give Back. If you are lucky enough to have enough remember those who don’t.

Work hard but love what you do and do what you love.

Laugh. A good joke will get you a long way.

Dream big. 

​Be happy.

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler! 

​Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

School's Out for Summer...

6/23/2016

 
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It is the last day of school and a celebration for kids everywhere. Moms however watch their kids skipping home with 50 pound backpacks and ask the same old question: “what the hell do we do with all this end of the year crap?” All their stuff accumulated from the entire school year now lies in a messy disgusting pile on your living room floor. 

School supplies once so perfect and new in September now huddle together crumbled and abused after eight months of living in your child’s backpack. Or as I call it the black hole. There are chewed pencils with half eaten erasers, dried up markers with no caps, unused highlighters in 15 different colors, dirty erasers, sticky lollipops, piles of crumpled papers, broken binders, ripped folders,the stapler I have been trying to find for six months and a writing journal with only one entry: “what I did on my summer vacation”.

While every September sales at Staples skyrockets, in June sales of garbage bags at Costco reach an all time high. Well that all depends if you are a newbie school parent or an experienced one with middle schoolers. The newbies keep everything. They lovingly go through every paper written and every art project as well as ohh and ahh, and post them on Facebook. They compile every last item into an expensive glittery box and custom engrave on it “kindergarten masterpieces”. 

The old timers have learned to ditch the sentimental attachment and be practical. We throw everything out. We keep maybe one or two writing samples to have something to show for our ridiculous private school tuition. All other crap goes in the garbage. The sanitation department has to hire extra trucks the week school ends.

Oh, did I mention the science projects. Every semester my son insists on after school science. Every year he comes home with the same disgusting silly putty. (That does not come out of hair easily) This year the teacher mixed up it. Alex came home one week with a bird feeder made from an old sports sock. The following week he made a potato plant wrapped in pantyhose. Either this teacher has a serious foot fetish or is cleaning out her sock drawer.

Now for the school bag. Putting your hand in that bag at the end of the school year is a dangerous and risky move. One never knows what you will find growing at the bottom. Best advice: burn the bag. 

Once the disinfecting is done parents can then enjoy the summer months of no homework and the only mess is ice cream dripping across your kitchen floor. All is balanced and tidy. Well, until the school supply catalogs start arriving in July and the cycle starts once again…

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

Lucky

6/2/2016

 
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The other day when I was at the pool with my three boys I felt myself being watched. The kids were swimming and I was sitting on a lounge chair reading a book. There was a woman staring at me out of the corner of her eye. As I got up to get some water I walked by her. I noticed at a closer glance her messy hair, stained shirt and frazzled look that could only mean one thing: she was the mother of young children.

She looked at me enviously and said, “You are SO LUCKY you don’t have to watch your kids!” I was taken aback by the statement and said the first thing that popped in my head. “Well they were not born this age, I paid my dues. But don’t worry in ten years you can be just like me.” And I walked away laughing to myself. Later that afternoon another disheveled newbie mom told me the exact same thing. Could someone else actually be jealous of me? Did they know how much laundry I did on a daily basis? Did they get what it entailed to relearn equations and geometry? Did they know I had more daily mileage on my car than a NYC Uber driver?

But getting back to dues yes I definitely paid mine. I had premature twins born six weeks early and spent three months on hospital bed rest. I did not wear maternity clothes or have baby showers. I wore hospital gowns and was not allowed to shower. When they came home after two weeks in the NICU I could barely walk and needed a wheelchair. This was followed by the craziest first two years of babyhood…

So honestly my dear frazzled young mothers it gives me great pleasure to watch my children. And no matter how old our children get don’t we always have to watch and worry about them?

When the baby and toddler worries fade, new fresh reasons to fret will bloom. We are parents for life and it never ends no matter how old they get. When my parents come visit the first thing my 72 year old father does is call his 91 year old mother to tell her he has arrived safely. If I don’t call my own mother I get an earful and a true Jewish guilt trip. 

As kids get older it changes from literally watching them to protectively watching over them. We offer guidance, advice, sometimes we push and sometimes we need to step back. 
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My twins are now thirteen and I have no idea of what to expect from these teenage years ahead. How do I watch over them and protect them in this crazy world?
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And it does all come full circle. Sometimes I will enviously look at the older mother next to me with her 20 something child who treats her to lunch and drives her home. I can’t help but think to myself, she is so lucky…


Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

Head In the Clouds

5/25/2016

 
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How many times did your parents tell you to stop daydreaming as a child? Why do we continue to tell our own kids to stop as well?

Daydreaming is what fuels their creativity and inspires them. It’s what gives them an escape from an otherwise mundane school day. We should be encouraging our kids to think outside of the box instead we stuff them into a cookie cutter educational box and shut the lid.

As a child I loved to make up pretend stories. When I was eight I created an elaborate wedding dress for my Barbie made out of toilet paper with a train that would rival that of princess Diana. I hosted an elaborate Barbie and Ken wedding that would outdo Kate and William’s.

I still daydream even today mostly when I am just walking. My best writing ideas always come from when I am in motion. In fact, I am writing this as I take my morning walk. This explains my well known clumsy side where I trip over everything, bump into walls and fall over my own two feet.

Which brings me to my point. We force kids to sit at desk all day at school, remain still and stop daydreaming. Then they go home and sit for homework. So when a kid can’t sit still or daydreams they get labeled in a negative way. We wonder why they get cranky, tired and act out. We put no value in motion and their need to be be creative..and yes just play.

Perhaps that is why some of the most creative successful people failed at school and reflect on being seen as misfits. Their minds were simply someplace else.

I did fine in school. I was probably a solid B student but never liked the structure or the routine. I hating writing in high school and my papers always came back “corrected” bleeding in red ink. As I went on to college I chose more hands-on, practical classes as they let me explore outside the classroom.

We all need time to dream and let our minds go not just as children but as adults too. I recommend however you take my advice and watch out for oncoming traffic… and glass doors. Ouch

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

The Latest Must-Have App for Parents, ParentsPal

5/23/2016

 
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​If you are like my wife and I, we rely on babysitters for everything from the occasional date night (occasional = once per month if we are lucky) to picking up the kids from school and taking them to an activity if we are still at work. There are a ton of services that help you find babysitters. That wasn’t our problem. The problem was we were still communicating and managing them in a very manual way. That is why we created ParentsPal.
 
ParentsPal was designed by parents, for parents, to more easily manage and communicate with babysitters they already use either regularly or for the occasional date night. This includes sharing key information, creating each babysitting appointment, managing tasks you want the babysitter to complete, and paying them through a secure mobile environment.  

The key features of the app include:
  • Create a Sitter or Parent Profile: The first step is creating your Parent or Sitter Profile. This information is only seen by your connected Parent or Sitter and only while they are working for you. Now you can stop writing all this information down on scrap paper hoping the Sitter doesn't loose it.
  • Setting Up Appointments: Parents can setup various dates and times when they need their babysitter. These requests are sent to your babysitter using his/her email address. You will be notified when they accept your appointment. No more Sitters wondering "Did you want me at 7 or was it 7:30?"
  • Task Creation: In each appointment, a Parent can setup Tasks they want the Babysitter to do. The Babysitter will be alerted at each task and the Parent will be informed when each task is complete. Finally, enough with all the "Are they doing what I asked them to do?"
  • Mobile Payment: Don't stop by the ATM on the way home. Simply use the mobile payment function within ParentsPal and save yourself time. I mean, who carries cash anymore anyway?
 
No more wondering if the babysitter knows when you need them.
No more wondering if the babysitter did what you asked them to do.
No more stopping by the ATM to grab cash on the way home.

 
The app is free for the first 30 days. After that, the Parents are charged $4 per month (you can cancel at anytime…no commitments) for unlimited use. Your babysitters are not charged anything to use the app. The charge is because we are not advertising in the app. Advertising requires us to sell or transfer your information and frankly, I use the app and I don’t want my family info shared with anyone. The information on this app is secure and is not shared.
 
Brought to you by ParentsPal. For more information, visit  www.parentspalapp.com or check out the app on the Apple App Store or Google Play Store. 


Finding Inner Peace (and a little quiet)

5/19/2016

 
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A few months ago, my sister-in law Vera and I decided we needed some time to ourselves to decompress and yoga seemed to be the right choice. Between us, we have six boys; and knowing that just getting out of the house on a weeknight would be an impossible feat, we hired a yoga instructor who was willing to come to us on a weekly basis.

Other than motivating ourselves to get excited about yoga after a long day, the biggest challenge was what do with our six boys (and one cute but overly attached dog) while we would be trying to find our  “inner peace”.  We decided to have the first session in Vera’s basement. We gave the children strict instructions that they were not to disturb us or come downstairs, and left them under the not so watchful eyes of my brother-in-law Jonathan.

Our instructor arrived and we immediately took a liking to her.  If anyone could inspire us she was that person! During this first session, we were not surprised to find that we were equally inflexible and uncoordinated. Our tree poses looked like trees during a Nor’easter. We laughed as we “transitioned” from our down dogs to our cobras. We tried desperately to relax as the sounds of 6 boys running and screaming in the living room vibrated above our heads. We tried to ignore Daisy’s whimpering and scratching at the basement door. We wondered where Jonathan was and grew frustrated at his inability to keep everyone quiet. But then something surprising happened. Somewhere between the final stretching and the soothing sounds of music emanating from our instructor’s iPhone, we managed to unwind. By the end of the hour amid all the chaos and cracking bones we did actually feel more relaxed.

Since then, we have kept up with our weekly sessions, even when life’s crazy schedule gets in the way. I did once miss half a session because my toilet overflowed. I came over to Vera’s house in tears, saying  “I have no time for yoga! I need to fix my toilet. Can I borrow your plunger?”

Our instructor continues to teach us how to focus our minds on the moment and away from the stresses and sounds of our daily lives.  For one hour every week, we simply focus attention on ourselves. For the most part, we’ve learned to tune out the kids, our husbands, the barking dog, the lawnmowers, the ringing phones and find our own version of quiet. Sure, there are still plenty of good laughs and unlimber limbs but it’s one hour that belongs to us, with lots of love and sparkles!

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World

Seven Reasons to Choose Home Care for Aging Parents

5/13/2016

 
by Vicki Salemi
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As tough as it may be to enlist the help of a "stranger" when it comes to caring for your parents, sometimes it's for the best. For one thing, it will take the strain off of you, but your parent will also benefit from professional care in the comforts of home. Whether it's being attentive to special medical needs of assisting with personal care or homemaking, having a home health care professional will provide a variety of benefits to both the patient and the family. 

1 - Home Care promotes healing. 
"I know that our clients enjoy a much better quality of life which many families have said helped to extend the lives of their lived ones.," says Peter Ross, CEO and co-founder of Senior Helpers. "We focused on healing the mind, not just the body." Maxine Hochhauser, CEO of Visiting Nurse Regional Health Care System adds that in many circumstances the person rehabilitates better in the home. "They are in a familiar environment and are more comfortable. This is particularly true with individuals suffering from dementias." 

2 - Home Care is safe. 
"Many risks such as infection are eliminated or minimized when care is given at home," says Ross. Quality home care by professional caregivers can help prevent issues that may become very serious within the home. One example includes preventing falls in the home since seniors may be too weak or dizzy from medication since they fall when they're cleaning or bathing. 

3 - Home care allows for maximum amount of freedom for the individual. 
Patients at home may be engaged with their typical daily activities as their health permits plus it allows patients to receive care in the least restrictive environment. "This is the most conducive to patient-centered care which allows individuals the most control over the care they'll receive and the manner in which they receive it," notes Hochhauser. "Plus, it allows individuals to remain in the community." 

4 - Home care gives them some control. 
As baby boomers age the home care option gives them more control over the type of care they'll get to choose. Hochhauser explains, "They want more choices and want to be a more active participant in their own care. Home care allows them the most say in their care as they are in the least passive situation." 

5 - Home care is personalized. 
According to Milca Pabon, RN, a home health care nurse with Adventist Home Health, "the best reason to choose home care is because the care that will be received in the home will be individualized to each patient according to their specific needs." Essentially home care is tailored to the needs of each patient as they receive one-on-one attention. 

6 - It eases burdens on the family. 
Pabon explains, "With the length of stay in the hospital decreasing patients are going home earlier and many of them do not choose to go to a rehabilitation center to recover," explains Pabon. Rather, they want to go home to their own environment with their loved ones and have someone provide them with care they'll need to reach their maximum level of function. She continues, "Families are willing to have their loved ones with them, but may feel inadequate or unable to provide their loved ones with the help that they might need." 

7 - Home care is comfortable. 
"Every study done has shown that people would prefer to stay in their home," says Constance Row, executive director of the American Academy of Home Care Physicians. There is familiarity and comfort of being in one's own environment surrounded by their loved ones. She notes, "It's a type of quality care that people would want for their senior relatives."

Senior Helpers Westchester takes pride in helping families sustain and maintain their loved one’s quality of life and safety at home. Their customized care consists of a variety of services tailored to someone’s exact needs. All of their caregivers undergo an extensive background screening and training. Their most important credential is being caring, empathetic, and compassionate people, who get satisfaction from helping others.

To find out more, visit the Senior Helpers website.

Swell

5/12/2016

 
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Photo Credit: Jane Goodrich Photography
If I could start my own school it would be magical. Not Hogwart’s magical but it would allow kids to soar…(just not on a broomstick).

It would be a school that fits a child’s needs and not the other way around.
First thing: No Labels!!

Schools are too quick to label, categorize and characterize children before they can even spell their name. These days there are too many evaluations, observations and classifications. It isn’t that most kids can’t learn but rather that they may learn in a different way.

Putting a kid in a class that doesn’t teach the way he or she needs makes the teacher disabled not the student. And in fact it is the teacher should be made to feel like a failure not the child.

More important than grades or report cards are making the child feel confident and proud of themselves. One of my proudest moments in elementary school was when at age 8 I was sent to the principal’s office. (no I never got into trouble) I had done very well on my spelling tests and was called out of class. The principal gave me a little stamp/sticker with a cartoon of a smiling bird and it had one word at the bottom: swell. I still have that sticker. I don’t remember my grades on those tests I just remember carrying that little sticker in my coat pocket and flying home.

And here are some interesting facts:

Einstein did not speak until he was four and did not read until he was seven, causing his teachers and parents to think he was stupid and had learning issues.

Thomas Edison was told his by his teachers that he was “too stupid to learn anything.”

Churchill struggled in school and failed the sixth grade.

Darwin said about himself, “I was considered by all my masters and my father, a very ordinary boy, rather below the common standard of intellect.”

And in the end it really doesn’t take much to make a child feel confident and proud of themselves. It could be a kind word, a little smile, a thumbs up or a tiny little sticker. Teachers need to look beyond the labels, the sometimes blank stares or confused looks and bring out the best in all their students. Any teacher who can do that can have my swell sticker…
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Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World.

RX

5/5/2016

 
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Photo Credit: Jane Goodrich Photography
“The more anthropologists and social scientists understand about human parents, the more emphatically they conclude that we were designed to raise children in small co-operative groups, and not in nuclear families.

Parenting is meant to take place where help is always at hand, in a collective setting where even the children begin rehearsing child-rearing skills from a young age.

The main reason why we struggle, why our patience runs short, is that our nuclear-family situation is entirely un-natural, unreasonable and unsustainable.
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No parent is meant to be at home alone with one or more children; it is Nature’s design to always have a fresh pair of hands nearby that we can turn to long before tiredness becomes exhaustion.”

So are we doing this parenting thing all wrong? Can I actually attribute my impatience, exhaustion, anxiety and craziness to an “unnatural and unreasonable” situation?

Is there an actual diagnosis to parenting in 2015?

I think doctors, pharmaceutical companies and alcohol companies have known about this diagnosis and kept it hidden from us all this time. They so easily prescribe medications for our said “depression, exhaustion anxiety and craziness."  Couldn’t they have prescribed us a trip to the movies, a dinner alone without kids,  or simply time to ourselves?

So we find ourselves in our little nuclear family of one or two parents taking it all on ourselves when it really does take a village.  But what do you if your village lives in Canada or across the world? What if you have no village at all?

We have family and friends who are there for us. But when it comes to the day to day operations it can be a very overwhelming task to run that little village alone.

When my twins were born I was very lucky. I had a huge village ready to lend a hand. My mother lived with us for three months and then I stayed with her in Canada for the summer. I told my husband I was not coming home unless there was help waiting for me. I saw every friend and family member at that time as a potential “baby holder.”

But everyone has to get back to their own day to day lives. And moms and dads are left on their own to figure out the tricky, complicated crazy world of parenting.

So if there is a diagnosis is there also a cure?

Remember that is okay to ask for help. It is perfectly permissible to say I can’t handle this today and to feel a need to walk away. We should not feel guilty about asking someone else to take over but instead welcome it. It takes a village to raise a child but it also takes a village to raise a parent.

I don’t know all the answers but I will prescribe this Motherly MD advice to you: take two minutes to yourself and call me in the morning…

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World.

Under the Big Top

4/13/2016

 
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Photo Credit: Jane Goodrich Photography
Motherhood can only best be described as a circus. Mothers are the acrobats, tightrope walkers, jugglers and of course the ring leaders. We deal with clowns, monkeys and the lions on a daily basis and sometimes we are the lions. And yet just like the elephants we work for peanuts.
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Juggler
Mothers can juggle anything: work, kids, dinner, laundry, homework, appointments, car pool, school, after school, meetings, cooking, bedtime… The list is endless and on a really rough day we can juggle fire.

Acrobat
A mom truly must be flexible at all times both physically and mentally. We can contort our bodies into any position for our kids (and sometimes for our husbands). Did you lose something under the bed, need something high up on the shelf, bottle fell under the seat of the car? We can also carry groceries, two kids, a purse and the car keys all at the same time. Milton Berle had once said “If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?”

Tightrope walker
We are always walking a very thin line in order to keep our lives and kids in balance. We know how to keep everything and everyone from falling off the tight rope. In fact, we are not only the tightrope walkers but the safety net as well.

Clowns and Monkeys
Oh the clowns or should I say our husbands? And men in general. But that’s all I am going to say about that. There is no doubt that our kids are the monkeys. They get into everything but always make us laugh and yes are very cute.

Freaks…
What mothers feel like at the end of the day. After bedtime it is always best to avoid looking at yourself in the mirror. We have glitter glue in our hair, maple syrup on our shirts, marker stains on our hands, and crumbs in our pockets. Step right up folks and see the crazy lady polish off a bottle of wine.
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Yes, motherhood is truly a three ring circus but it is also the greatest show on earth….

Marcie Gandell is a full time Westchester NY Mom to three boys and a part-time web designer. She is also a cook, housekeeper, chauffeur, handyman, expert negotiator and an excellent juggler!

Read more from her at her blog, Random Stupid Thoughts, a Mom's View of the World.

Kindergarten Readiness

4/4/2016

 
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Photo Credit: Jane Goodrich Photography
Kindergarten has evolved over the last several years.   Half days and naptime are essentially a thing of the past. With these changes, many parents are concerned about how to prepare their child for the first day of Kindergarten and the academic challenges ahead. Keep in mind that many of your child’s prerequisite skills have already been developed through play, nursery school and an enriched home environment.

Here are some additional steps you can take to further develop those skills and to make sure that your child’s first big step will be a successful one.

Fine Motor Skills:
Building your child’s hand strength is an important step to prepare them for writing, cutting and pasting activities.
  • When your child is engaged in a writing/coloring activity, always provide different size pencils, markers and crayons. Try to encourage an age appropriate tripod (3 finger) grip. This allows the child to write more efficiently and will increase their endurance.
  • Have manipulatives like Play-Doh and kinetic sand available for them to manipulate and build hand strength.
  • Have them string large and small beads and build with different Lego shapes and sizes. Encourage them to follow patterns and sequences. This will help build eye hand coordination as well.
  • Let your child use scissors to cut along lines on paper, cardboard and even chunks of play-doh. It may be surprising, but cutting is a skill they are expected to have already acquired upon entering Kindergarten.

Letter Recognition:
  • Have your child identify all 26 letters of the alphabet in both upper and lower case forms. Place magnets on the fridge in random order. See if your child can point to the letters as you name them and then ask your child to name the letters as you point to them. Have him/her organize the letters alphabetically. See if they can separate vowels from consonants. Have them find the letters to spell their own name.
  • Make them aware of letters and words all around them by playing “I spy”. Today we are searching for the letter ‘S’. Let’s see if we can find 10 words that have an ‘S’ in them during our trip today.

Reading:
  • Most of us exposed our children to reading when they were infants. We understood that literacy skills start early, as a young child is able to identify the front cover of a book, as well as the back cover and the pages. Now it’s time to familiarize your child with the authors and illustrators of their favorite books, explaining what those words mean.
  • When you read to your child, provide a model by pointing to the words so your child will learn to read from the left to the right and from the top to the bottom.
  • Nursery rhymes and Dr. Seuss books are especially wonderful because they teach rhyming in a fun way. Rhyming is an essential skill for reading, spelling and writing in later grades. You can make reading an interactive activity by leaving out words and letting your child fill in the rhyming words or phrases. They feel like they are already reading along with you. They may even like to “read” to a younger sibling

Writing:
  • Have your child practice writing his/her name by copying your model. Then remove the model and have your child write his/her name independently. Begin with all uppercase letters and then move to the initial uppercase, followed by lowercase.
  • Practice writing letters of the alphabet, again presenting a model and then removing the model when your child is ready. Keep in mind, it is best to teach your child the proper letter formation right from the beginning!
  • Use different textures to make the writing experience multi-sensory and more fun! Write with shaving cream, use sandpaper or little carpet scraps. A white board and dry erase markers help pass the time on a long car ride. A sponge square and a chalkboard is also a fun way to practice letter formation.

Math: 
  • Practice counting aloud with your child as you go about your day. Count the number of plates you need to set the table. How many cheerios are left on his/her plate? Use math words like “more” and “less” or “most” and “least” when you are making comparisons. During screen time use some hands on math apps.
  • Look for numbers in your daily life – what number is your house? Can you find the number 7 in the grocery store? Let’s count out 4 apples. Use the numbers all around us so to teach counting and number recognition.
  • Don’t forget to work on shapes, colors and size too. Most children already recognize shapes, colors and sizes independently, but help them generalize those skills by finding different shapes embedded in other objects. Reinforce colors by asking your child to be specific in a request, “would you like the little blue ball or the big red ball?”

Classroom Behavior: 
Becoming a member of the classroom community is not always an easy step for children.  According to kindergarten teacher, Julie Cappuccilli, it is important that “students be able to take turns, share, and work in a cooperative environment”.   Here are some additional steps you can take to help make the kindergarten transition easier.
  • Practice building reading stamina and attention to task by reading longer stories and eventually increasing to chapter books. Some suggested titles can be found here: http://www.daddyread.com/earlyElem.html
  • Increase the number of multi-step directions you expect your child to follow through games such as ‘Simon Says’ and by performing multi-step tasks around your house.   This will also facilitate independence e.g., “After you eat breakfast, please bring your plate to the sink, and wipe your face and hands.”
  • Provide your child with social opportunities with peers.   Take your child to playgrounds, play-groups or classes. Use real life situations to discuss problem solving strategies, to find ways to deal with frustrations and to learn what it means to compromise. Help them to find the words to let a peer know that they hurt their feelings.

Remember, every child is different and every child develops at their own pace. Your child’s Kindergarten teacher understands that not every child will enter their classroom with the same set of skills. If your child does not have all of the skills outlined above, before he/she walks through the school doors, do not fret! With the guidance from their teachers and your continued support, these skills will emerge in their own time. Remember that your child is a butterfly.   She/he will develop at his/her own time with his/her own special qualities and strengths and you will always be there to guide them along their journey.


Danielle Meyer is the Founder of DEM Tutoring, an Academic Tutor & Certified Teacher. For more information and to begin your child’s tutoring please call: 917-697-5942 or email at: demtutoring@gmail.com.


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